Because I am a pastor people are going to assume that I
love Jesus. And this is true. I truly aspire to love Jesus with all my heart,
soul, and mind. I can say unconditionally that Jesus is my Lord and Savior.
I’m guessing that some might be interested how I
developed my beliefs about Jesus. So I want to share in this blog some stories
that influenced my love for Jesus and my relationship with him Jesus. And
hopefully these stories can be helpful to all people—those who have a strong
relationship with Jesus and those who are cautious but still interested in
Jesus. And perhaps helpful to those who hardly think about Jesus.
One of the first stories I remember about Jesus happened
during worship at Westminster Presbyterian church in Worthington, Minnesota. I
was probably under five. For whatever reason I was sitting in the back row of
the sanctuary with one of my parents. I think we got there late that day and
the back row was the only place we could sit. I usually was bored out of my
mind at church, but for some reason that day I listened to the New Testament
reading that was about Jesus. I don’t remember the specific story, but I do
remember that it was a story where Jesus stood up for an outsider. Maybe it was
the woman caught in adultery, or maybe it was the Samaritan, or maybe it was Mary
Magdalene. The thought that went through my mind was, “Wow, he really cares for
that person and that surprises me.” And then the story went on to share that a
leader in the religious community didn’t care for that person. Which made me
wonder why Jesus would care for this outsider and the religious person
wouldn’t. My five year-old mind thought that it would have made more sense if
the religious leader cared for this outsider. Isn’t that what religious people
are supposed to do? Jesus did care, and my very young brain understood that
there was something special about Jesus.
Even though church was boring, I was always interested when
I went to church to hear a story about Jesus. These stories surprised me—they caused
me to think—they made me wonder what Jesus would say to people if he was alive
today. He frequently contradicted what I thought he would do—and that made me
curious.
Because of my experience in living for three summers and
a school year in Inner City Kansas City I came to believe that Jesus has a
special place in his heart for those who are poor. And he would have high
expectations for those who have wealth. He would want those who have resources
to share with those who don’t. For me this is not a political statement—it’s a
moral belief that comes out of the stories of Jesus.
Early in college I read the Sermon on the Mount for the
first time. I saw a vision for the world that Jesus wanted to create—the
Kingdom. It is a vision where the poor in spirit, the meek, the merciful, those
who hunger and thirst for righteousness are blessed. In this vision people
shared their inner light with others with humility and authenticity.
As I started being called into religious ministry, I
became aware that I wanted to share the love that Jesus had for people. In fact
one mantra that I’ve ended my prayers for close to thirty years is that I “love
like Jesus loved.” His love is very special. It was shared without conditions.
For a newcomer it’s easy to receive; for a person who worships often this love
can be demanding. Jesus shared a morality that is needed in the world. This morality
is centered on his love—a love that he shared freely and without condition.
When I first started at Chain of Lakes someone shared
that they hoped that Jesus would be mentioned at least once during every
worship service. That is no problem for me. I enjoy talking about Jesus; I enjoy
praying to Jesus; I enjoy reading and learning about Jesus; I enjoy trying to
discern what Jesus wants me to do. I’m not trying to earn any “Jesus” points
from anyone about my own love for Jesus. I share my love for Jesus with a deep
sense of humility. I don’t claim any special privilege because of my
relationship to Jesus; in fact being with Jesus prompts me to want to serve in
a humble way.
A lot of damage has been done by the church in the name
of Jesus. This damage causes me a high level of pain. I believe that Jesus
would be appalled at the behavior and teachings by people who claim his name. But
this damage does not deter me from talking about Jesus or wanting to
communicate his love.
I’ve read the stories in the gospels about Jesus hundreds
of times—maybe even thousands of times. And I still find them interesting; they
still challenge me; they still provide a role model for me in how to act. When
I find myself in a difficult situation I ask myself how Jesus would respond to
this situation. This is often my prayer.
No one forced me to fall in love with Jesus. This happened through my own process of discovery. This is what some might find surprising. I never thought I would be a pastor when I was young. And if my parents hadn't taken me to church, I'm fairly certain that I would not be going to church today. My skepticism would have won out. Even though I'm very skeptical, coming into contact with the stories of Jesus helped me love him.
But I'm not skeptical about Jesus or what he would want to do today. I love Jesus because I believe that the love he demonstrated truly represents the best hope for the world. I've never encountered anything better!
