Reunion!

Reunion! This past weekend I had the opportunity to attend my 40^th college reunion at Carleton College. Fortieth college reunion? Am I really that old? As I learned in my student years at Carleton, facts don’t lie.

At Carleton reunions are shared for classes in five-year increments. This past weekend the class of 2021, 2016, 2011, 2006 ... (you get the idea) gathered. Carleton invests in reunions because a lot of money is raised for the school. It was announced during the large gathering this past Saturday morning, that the class of 1976 had given 28 million to the college. A significant chunk of that give came from estates. Carleton has a source of important funding because of Reunion. That kind of financial giving makes it apparent that the college wants to have Reunion go well.

This was the first college reunion for me in ten years as COVID prevented an on-site reunion five years ago. I've attended almost every reunion of my class since I graduated in 1986. 

Reunion at Carleton is like a weekend, summer camp. Many stay in the dorms; kids have planned activities; meals are provided; a significant number of activities happen during the day. I live about a hour from Carleton, so I didn't stay on campus. I ended up driving three times from Blaine to Northfield and back to enjoy the festivities.

My wife, Amy, was gracious to join me for one day of Reunion. But to be a spouse at Reunion is very difficult—the ultimate third wheel experience. Amy decided to attend as she enjoys meeting Carleton alums. And Carleton alums are very interesting people. All of them are intelligent, most are on the liberal side of the political side, and all will share their opinions. We are Carleton students—we were educated on how to develop and share opinions!

For me a meaningful part of Reunion was participating in an outdoor remembrance gathering for people in our class who have passed away in the past five years. I think there are fifteen people who have passed. At the remembrance gathering many people came forward to share memories of the deceased. I only knew a few of the people who have passed, but listening to these stories was very moving.  One person who I did know was Lauris Heyerdahl. I played football with him for four years. Football players develop a brotherhood that is special. A woman who was a friend of Lauris shared beautiful stories about Lauris and their friendship. I felt like I was in heaven during the remembrance gathering. Time seemed to stop, the setting and weather was almost perfect, and everyone who attended paid close attention. The collective spirit of all of us who were present was full of compassion and care.

Attending a gathering organized for football alums was also special. Coach Tom Journell did a terrific job of welcoming the football alums who attended and sharing a talk about the state of the football program. I can hardly wait to watch a game at Sullivan Field in Laird Stadium this fall.

One lovely tradition of Reunion is the parade of classes. Each class walks from the Bald Spot on campus into the chapel. When the people older than us pass our group it’s almost impossible not to realize that this is how we are going to look like in five, ten and fifteen years; when we pass the classes who are younger than us, it’s almost impossible not to think about how we looked when we were that age. In one short parade we see the future and remember the past.

Alison Byerly, President of Carleton, shared a talk about the college when everyone was gathered in the Chapel. She talked about the difficulties the college encountered this past year, especially with the ICE raids in Minnesota. She also talked about the challenges that AI present to colleges. She did note that in being a small college, Carleton is better positioned than large colleges to be able to recognize student work that is generated by AI.

On Sunday I had the opportunity to speak during the chapel service. Normally I share sermons at worship, but I wasn’t asked to preach. I was asked to share a reading. What reading do I share at an alumni chapel service? I asked my Facebook friends and others for suggestions. Nothing resonated with me until I went to the bookstore on my first day of Reunion and saw a book of poems by Mary Oliver. The poems gave me something to share. I ended up sharing the poems, “Invitation" and "Mindful.” And now I’ve made a new commitment to myself to read one Mary Oliver poem a day.

Reunions are intense—they require that our brains pay attention and listen closely to the people with whom we hold conversations. We have our brains opened to remember stories that happened many years ago. We are reminded of the identities we carried in college. Many people shared with me their memory of me being the captain of the football team and concertmaster of the orchestra. These identities are like old clothes--some fit, others don't any more. I am inspired to keep playing my violin. Thankfully I have opportunities. 

Because of their intensity I don’t need to go back to Reunion for another five years. Until then I’m looking forward to being in contact with the people I saw this past weekend.  I don’t think the word, “Tribe” completely describes an alumni class, but it's close. The people with whom I graduated are my people. Not that I own them, but I belong to them. We have common experiences that always connect us. And because of Reunion we have the opportunity to take steps deeper into friendships that were forged when all of us were much younger.