Celebrating our faith story of being a two-church family

This past weekend, Amy, Hannah and I have reveled in the celebration we enjoyed at Hannah’s high-school graduation party.  As I shared on my own Facebook page, our hearts were full of love as we witnessed the support of hundreds of people for Hannah.  Pictures of the party can be seen on my Facebook page at: https://www.facebook.com/hmoorepaul

This blog is more than a thank-you to everyone who came to the party. It’s a story of how faith has played a role in our family.  Amy, Hannah and I couldn’t have enjoyed such a wonderful experience this past Friday night without the support of adults in the Catholic congregations and Presbyterian congregations where we've served.    

When Amy & I met 21 years ago, our faith was one part of our relationship that connected us.  As we got to know each other we would talk for long periods of time about God and the church and the role that faith played in our lives.  Except we had an issue.  Amy was Catholic who attended Pax Christi Catholic Church in Rochester; I was a Presbyterian pastor who served Community Presbyterian Church in Plainview.  I wasn’t going to change professions, and Amy had no interest in changing her religious affiliation.  As we dated and then got married, we decided to become a two-church family.  I would attend Mass on Saturday afternoons and Amy would attend worship at the Presbyterian church I served.  This arrangement continued when our family moved to the north Metro.  I participate in St. Joseph’s of the Lake Catholic Church in Lino Lakes and Amy participates in Chain of Lakes Church.

When we started our two-church participation we each agreed that our religious participation had to be voluntary.  I couldn’t manipulate Amy into attending the Presbyterian church; she couldn’t do the same to me as I attended the Catholic church. 

This voluntary agreement has always worked.  Each of us sees the church as one body made up of different parts.  I’ve often used the metaphor of faith being a path with denominations being a car that travels on the path.  Both Amy and I are interested in the success of each car that travels on the path. 

When Hannah was born people asked Amy & I where Hannah would attend church.  We shared that she would follow our lead.  Hannah would attend two churches.  And she has.  Just like us, Hannah has gone to Mass on Saturday evenings and then worship at a Presbyterian church on Sunday mornings.  

Amy & I were blessed that important dates in her faith were moments of unity and not division.  The local Catholic priest in Plainview officiated her baptism during a worship service at the Community Presbyterian church in Plainview.  Hannah received first Communion at the Catholic church.  She was confirmed at both the Catholic church and the Presbyterian church.

People will sometimes ask, “Is Hannah a Catholic or Presbyterian? She’s a Christian who travels in the Presbyterian car and the Catholic car.  Has she been confused by the different teachings of the church?  No.  In reality there is more there is more that is similar to Catholics and Presbyterians than that is different.  Has Hannah ever resisted participating in two churches?  Fortunately not.  Amy & I established the ground rules early that going to church is part of our family.  On a weekend our normal routine is to attend church at two different congregations.  This routine is so ingrained in our family's life that it would seem odd to change.    

What has made all of this church participation so beautiful is Hannah has been surrounded by adults her entire life who are interested in her.   Hannah learned at an early age that she could trust adults.  Adults were interested in her; they wanted to know what she was doing; they cared about what happened in her life; they had no “agenda” besides her own well-being.

One of the best reasons for parents to encourage their kids to participate in a local church is the interaction kids will have with adults.  In almost every faith community—and sure there are faith communities that are not healthy and where adults have acted in in inappropriate and unlawful ways—adults will take a healthy interest in youth.  Adults will build relationships with youth that will make a lasting impression. 

Our family got to celebrate these relationships this past Friday night at Hannah’s graduation party.  Some adults drove hundreds of miles to celebrate this milestone on her journey.  For this Amy and I are grateful. 

Amy & I have a daughter who has been raised by a village.  Hannah has received something in these congregations that she couldn’t have received in any other place.  She has received faith-filled, healthy interest from many adults in the Catholic church and the Presbyterian church.  This experience of healthy relationships is one of the best reasons for any adult to insist that their children participate in a congregation. 

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