Day 18 Does uncertainty turn us towards God or away from God?

Good morning, friends. This is day 18 of a weekday video devotional series called, “Facing fear without being afraid.” If you enjoy the content, share it on your own Facebook page, like it, make a comment yourself.

During Holy Week I’m looking at times in the last week of Jesus’ life when he experienced strong emotions. We might compare them to a COVID-19 moment that we’ve had.

Today I want to look at the story of Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane. It happened right after Jesus had been in the Upper Room celebrating the Passover with his disciples. He took Peter, James and John and went to pray. As he prayed he became grieved and agitated. He threw himself on the ground and said to his abba, father, “take this cup from me.” Jesus asked if the pain and suffering of the next day would be stopped.

Jesus was uncertain.

We can relate to him.  Who hasn’t felt uncertain during COVID-19. Just yesterday 83 new cases of COVID-19 were announced in Minnesota, the highest number ever. At some point these numbers are going to start to go down, but no doubt we still are in the height of this pandemic.

It’s natural to be uncertain.

How long is this going to last?

When can my kids go back to school?

When can I visit my favorite restaurant?

When can the churches open again.

We’re uncertain. Being uncertain is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign that we’re human. Just as Jesus was human as he prayed in the garden of Gethsemane.

The key question is “What do we do with our uncertainty?”

Is all of this uncertainty causing us to turn away from God? Or turning towards God.  We’re either going closer or farther away. I’m not sure there is a middle ground right now.

Jesus is our example. In the midst of his uncertainty Jesus prayed to his Abba, “yet not what I want, but what you want.” Jesus was still looking for the direction of his Abba and he was willing to follow it.

One of my favorite phrases is “God is the source of our healing and not the cause of our pain. In the midst of our suffering we turn ourselves to God—at even a deeper level than before. 

I’ve encouraged you to do breath prayers, and I’ll keep encouraging you. I set my alarm for five times a day. When the alarm goes off I pray, Lord let me choose hope.  Five breaths, thirty seconds. My mind is clear; I’m ready to face the next hour.

In some ways, this feels like what Jesus was doing in the Garden when he was experiencing anxiety—and ultimately seeking God’s way. When we commit ourselves even more deeply to God we can face our fear without being afraid.